i'm not on HRT yet but i feel it is necessary to say this, i'm not happy, living as male and not transitioning is making me miserable, i'm not enjoying life at all, i hate this so much i hate the fact that poeple are seeing me like this, the fact that this is who my friends are making memories with, i hate it so much, i'm actively wasting my life like this, the only thing that distracts me is when i go to the store to buy a peach monster every morning, everything else sucks, i don't care about uni because i don't want to graduate like this, i feel empty talking to friends not even they can make me dissociate from my horrible body anymore, and engaging with my hobbies just feels like a waste, and the worst part of all of this is i can't even transition until i move out of my evil parents house, i'm hoping i get a job soon so i can stop living in this rotting body, i'm really hoping for some form of salvation.
i realy think i need to say this because people don't know how inportant transition is. i felt so much better when i was transitioning before, even if i saw little to no changes due to how long i was transitioning for, i felt like i was getting somewhere with my life, i felt like i was finaly gonna be seen the way i wanted to be seen by people, i was finaly starting to feel comfortable in my body transitioning, it made my live a more fufilling life. i really hope i can get back on HRT soon...
